Saturday, 15 July 2017

Either say nothing or gracefully put your foot down.

Namaste guys what's shaking.

Since a lot of people I know are expecting a baby in the near future I thought maybe I'd shed some light on a few things.

Let's kick off with a when you should tell people that you're having a baby? Obviously you need to let your job know if your employment involves heavy lifting and stress. Or if it's high risk. Or you work with people who are constantly sending you to do heavy lifting .

If you have one of those bosses who is a complete cunt then you need to perhaps speak to a representative or a solicitor about him/her.

When should you tell people like friends and family? I would say wait as long as you can because God forbid something happens and I am sorry to tell you that it can happen , then you need to then tell people something else. Wait til you are into the second trimester or when it's really starting to get obvious.

Avoid advice that people from older generations will tell you.

I've heard stupid things that pregnant women still hear from people who haven't realised that its the 21st century.

If you've had multiple miscarriages and every Tom, Sick Larry tells you you need bed rest. Unless one of these is a doctor , don't let them scare monger you.

When people insist that you literally need to eat for 2 when you need to consume about 300 extra calories after the second trimester.

Sure there are envious people who aren't as happy as you are and will tell you old wives tales but I'd just ignore them. You have an obstetrician, family doctor, nurses and midwife that will put your mind at ease if you have doubts. The rest is common sense.

Suddenly everyone is an expert in pregnancy and what you can or can't do which is why do don't feel like telling anyone just yet.

Don't listen to people who tell you that they are going to curse you or say that "God" will punish you for what ever reason. If you really have to answer , tell them what I tell them "aren't you a little too old for imaginary friends?"

Don't let people hijack your pregnancy .

What I mean is that people and I mean family and friends will start planning things as if being pregnant has robbed you the power of free thinking and speech.

You can either say thanks for the input and be polite knowing that you or father have made your own plans. Or tell them straight what your plans are or tell them to mind their own business.

Food suggestions is another, when they tell you that you have to literally eat for 2 as i mentioned earlier or certain foods are good for you when they were on the obstetricians "do not eat" list. Like Cod Roe.

I have never understood why people insist those tiny eggs are good for you. Surely it isn't.

When you tell people from an older generation that you are not permitted to eat certain things and they tell you "oh but I ate this when I was pregnant and I was fine!"

You tell them that either times have changed or that what ever you can't eat now is probably because of contamination.

And then people go ahead and bring you or make you something that you dont like or have been strongly advised to not eat. Then when you refuse they think you're either overreacting or ungrateful. How about asking first before acting like some kind of self appointed pAtron saint of prenatal nutrician!?

Names is another thing that causes arguments and stress.

Some Grandparents still think that parents need to name them after them or what ever name they tell the expectant parents.

I was named after my grandmother whom I didn't meet. It was both my father's and grandfather's idea.

Boy have I struggled with my full name to the point that I only use it in formal stuff and work. Now it's constantly associated with a murder victim.

My daughter is named after a song because her dad wanted to name her after the actual singer but I reminded him that people would think less of the artist's talent and more Of the reason she died.

Actually I may reconsider Amy in the future. Lots of kids are called Elvis.

A lot of people didn't like the name because it wasn't common enough or biblical enough and made suggestions. By the time we went the registry office she had already had documents with the name we gave her or in this case she did a Leonardo Di Caprio and chose her first name he self by kicking.

Kindly say thanks for the suggestion but we are sticking to our choice.

If they get upset then so what? My parents have told me more than once that they won't get upset if I choose not to name my kids after them.

My reason to not let people influence me was because I didn't want to make the same error as my mum.

As I mentioned before my dad named me and my mum could name the next baby what ever she wanted. Her first choice was Elvis but my grandma talked her out it. Why? She was free to name him what ever she wanted.

That's why I didn't take suggestions and will never take suggestions.

And if they tell you to name your child after a relative who's dying or a name they like, don't fall for it and don't feel bad when they begin to try to emotionally blackmail you.

It's your child, not theirs.

Please don't give your child a name that is out dated or hard to pronounce. That goes for old biblical names. Why Would you that to your child?

My father in law is obsessed with the name Jairus. He tried to suggest it to his ex daughter in law ,my partner's ex who refused which means that she does have a tiny bit of common sense in her head.

I'd rather Caleb than Jairus. it sounds awful even in Spanish. Sorry for any one named that or naming their kid that.

We did think of Jacob for a boy then thought against it, especially with it becoming popular after the Twilight saga.

I could go on all day about this but I'm thinking that maybe going more in-depth with a video.

That being said, namaste til next time.

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